orteil42:

texas so far :

• ambient air is like someone is breathing on you. all the time
• all cars and TVs are at least 3 times the size of their european counterpart
• texas, USA really wants to remind you that you are in texas, USA
• i can see like 3 american flags from the front yard
• what’s with Miracle Whip ?
• everything gives off the impression that i’m both in a cozy welcoming place and about to get shot
• why do you people need so many variations of everything. seriously guys you don’t need cinnamon-flavored broomsticks, what the fuck
  
• ads for really greasy food marketed as organic
• ads for meds with tons of side-effects, mostly for dealing with consequences of eating really greasy food. also usually marketed as organic
• ads for lawyers and insurance, mostly for dealing with consequences of meds with tons of side-effects. haven’t seen any organic marketing for those yet but i’m waiting
• if it’s not fried or smoked, it’s pickled